Open Love Letter to Dan Mullen

Dear Danny-kins,

We’ve been secretly watching you at Mississippi State University all season, and it is really making us horny for the good ole days.  Our break-up was amicable, we miss you, can’t we can make another run at it? We know we’ve let ourselves go a bit, but we’ll get on P90X or the South Beach Diet and with your help we’ll get our bang’n body back.

We know we weren’t good to you and we’re sorry.  We took you for granted and FireDanMullen.com was uncalled for.  Can you forgive us?

Reasons for coming back…

1.) Your team is bowl eligible at 8-4, and has accepted a bid to the Gator Bowl against Michigan. Congrats, but do you honestly think you can compete with Auburn, Alabama, and LSU in the West? Plus we’re Florida…and we’re sexy dammit.

2.) MSU was 5-7 last year, and some how you turned it around going 4-4 in the SEC.  Think what you can do with our talent next year.

3.) We lost 5 games and looked awful doing it and Addazio is abusive…we can’t take it anymore. It’s obvious he’s fed our Offense too many Krispy Kremes and slapped John Brantley around a little bit.

4.) Everyone hates MSU’s cowbells. It’s annoying. Seriously.

5.) You get to unpack all that Gator gear that’s in a box in the attic.  We know you still have it.

6.) Last time you were here we won championships and scored more than 1 or 2 Offensive TDs a game. It’s obvious we need you.  Need you real bad.

What time should we pick you up from Gainesville airport?  Come on, we’ll even let you decide which side of the bed you want to sleep on.  Please!!!!!!

Remember how we used to let you do anything you wanted in the backfield!!  :: winks ::

Love,
Gator Nation

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One Response to Open Love Letter to Dan Mullen

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